Tagged: drinking

A Brief List of Things I’m Going to Do While My Kid Is at My Parents’ For a Week

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This came up when I Googled “moms gone wild.” Related: Don’t Google that.

-Drink.

-Day-drink

-Play my guitar at 11pm

-Yell, “I CAN MAKE ALL THIS NOISE BECAUSE MY KID ISN’T HERE!” at times when I know my roommates aren’t sleeping. Continue reading

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An Apology To The Moms At The Bar

Dear Moms at the bar,

I want to apologize for all of the times I’ve rolled my eyes and snarked in your direction. For the times I’ve complained not quietly about your exuberance. For the times I’ve muttered for you all to grow the fuck up and act like you’ve left your house before. For the words said and implied, the haikus written, the faces made – I apologize deeply and sincerely.

There were times in my life when I went out drinking frequently. I had favorite bars, drinking buddies, high tolerance and disposable income. I’d go out and there’d be a mom group at the bar and I’d sigh in disgust that they were THE WORST. I’d make sure to sit far away from them, hoping they’d be ignorable.
Continue reading